Today on subway back to school.
She just put her head on my shoulder for 30 seconds, and she told me, she felt lonely and could not focus on study.
I said, you had your boyfriend, you know, there was always someone there for you to talk, share, cry and also the comfort and security.
She said, but still feel lonely, not in tv-watching time, might be I had been with him so long.
Today laid in bed after taking a short nap, strongly felt, the irrestatable force to think about the life, about fight against lots of things till the end of life, loneliness, helplessness, bored security, real and boring life involve eating, clothing, taking caring of things.
That's said, life is not easy.
I tried to make my life meaning, also including joined in some oxymoron trips, actually doing some stupid community volunteer things, bought something to make myself happy, even tried to spoil myself, and thinking the regular life is a kind of guarantee.
I have a big eyes, but once one of my old classmate, she said, do not open your eyes so large. She was evil, so since then I kept my eyes on a position that half open, just put my eyelids half down. I did not hate her, a selfish bitch. oh I do dislike her, how can a girl be so selfish that envy someone else's big eyes just cause she has a small eyes.
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